White Elephant

It was truly a memorable Christmas! I taught all afternoon, but I decorated and listened to Christmas music in the morning. We had a small dinner for those who don't teach in the evening, at my apartment. There were two wok-ed and stuffed chickens, sweet potatoes with pecans (OMG!), mashed potatoes, Mexican squash (by yours truly), and steamed English pudding (which is really cake, but calling cake pudding is ok on Christmas).

Then I had a small party. I still have wine and tons of leftover sweets suitable as bribes to get my students to come to office hours on Sunday. We even had White Elephant presents under the tree. The presents were great. I gave a coaster, which I crocheted. I received a roll of toilet paper, embedded within which was a little gold statue of Mao.

This week we are doing oral presentations in class. We have class on Saturday to make up for Dec. 31st, but Jan. 1st is a freebie. My students asked for a review instead of a film on Saturday. It's craziness!

-吴佩芙

Oasis

On Friday night I went to eat Buddhist food with some of my distinguished colleagues, one of whom teaches in the English department here, and she is a vegetarian. It was completely wonderful because all of the Buddhist food is vegetarian, made with texturized vegetable protein that tastes like meat. So the entire menu was "safe," and we ordered a set meal for three.

After dinner, we went to the old standby: WalMart. I couldn't find an ice pack, but I got a few other necessities. We also went to the coffee shop, where we can buy coffee and Twinnings tea and a small assortment of Western goods, including sprinkles.

Then we went to our English dept. colleague's apartment in the city. It was so beautiful, just like an IC professor's house. Bookshelves, huge CD collection, art...things I haven't seen in a long time. On top of everything, she has an oven and she had made brownies. It's been so long since I ate brownies that I had forgotten what they were supposed to taste like, but they were such a treat, and I'm sure I will remember it for a long time.

- 吴佩芙

Fishbowl

The small fish dart about, weaving in and out of every nook and cranny. Bigger fish are slow and more controlled, enjoying the occasional trick. Then there are the fish who swim, get tired of swimming, and just drift on the current.

It was my first time skating at the rink on campus and my second time on roller blades, but it felt kind of like we were in a fishbowl. I was the drifter most of the time, with elementary kids whizzing by me and asking me in Chinese if I was French or Canadian. "Danny" the president of the skater club, who also sold me the skates, came over and strapped some knee and hand pads on me, and he and one of my students hoisted me up. I didn't fall even once. I was able to skate pretty well after a few minutes of practice, so Danny looked up "center of gravity" in a cell phone and explained how to stop and how to turn on a dime.

When I was in college, I went with Allison to the community center for roller skating. It was a service that was frozen in time. We were the only ones there, and we rented skates for $1. It was some of the most fun we had in college. That and log-rolling down the Pentacrest hill. She was my crazy friend. She was like Maude from Harold and Maude, with an eccentric collection of knick-knacks, art, and music. I was reminded of roller skating, and that pleasant throw-back from my university years.

-吴佩芙

Don't Wag at Iowa...

Yes, I saw this written on a shirt yesterday, while I was walking down the street. I didn't have a camera, so I thought I would go back today. (I wanted to get my hair cut anyway.) I went back to the shop, and the shirt wasn't in the window anymore, and they wanted 189 yuan for it, and they wouldn't let me pay them to take a picture.

I had a great day. I went to Coffee Language downtown. I had coconut black tea and pumpkin-seafood soup. I had my book The Changeling, which I haven't read for a long time. It was very relaxing. They were playing really great music too, Neil Sedaka, Skeeter Davis, Sinatra, and one that sounded like a Sinatra song, but it was in Chinese.

I got a massage and a haircut. The massage was as good as usual. The haircut was my first one in China, and can I just say: These guys are good...These guys are very good. At first, I had to wait because the place was busy. It looked busy enough that if I was in the States, I would have to wait for an hour. The great thing about businesses here, is that they always have a huge staff on hand. So, I waited for 15 min, watching some fish in a fountain and drinking complementary green tea. They took me to a basement area, where they had set up some bed-like implements over wash basins. There are mostly men down there, and their jobs are to wash people's hair. American salons could take a lesson from Chinese salons because in Chinese salons your head is not supported by your neck in the wash basin. There is a little rubber square attached, which supports the back of your head. They massage your head for 30 min, very thoroughly. At the end, they clean your ears. I mean they put a swab in your ear, and it was so creepy. I was like, "I don't even know you!"

After that, I went back upstairs for the main event. I said "yi li mi-one cm,' and he got it. I think he checked the work of my American salon, and just followed the basic idea of what I had done previously. Another observation is, I don't speak much Chinese, but the stylist actually only cut off 1 cm, as I asked. I don't think I have ever succeeded in getting such a small amount cut in the States, where I enjoy stylists who speak my language, and I can tell them the "I'm trying to grow my hair out" story.

-吴佩芙

I don't get it, but thanks for the free nutmeg...

Another successful trip to town ended with me and my bags full of bread, Campbell's corn and mushroom soup, dried mint (that's right...), a fleece hoodie, and a 10-yuan Christmas tree and garland.

I had a goal, though. It was to find nutmeg. I had done some sleuthing, and I found out that nutmeg is used in Chinese medicine, for all kinds of crazy things, including for abdominal pain, diarrhea, and vomiting mostly. It also has hallucinogenic properties. Anyway, if it's used in Chinese medicine, I figured I would be more likely to be able to find it. The supermarket didn't have it, but I found a little pharmacy while I was walking down the street. It was a Western pharmacy with TCM herbs in the back. I asked for rou dou kou, and the clerk took me to the back, and opened the huge jar filled with nutmeg. The scent was delicious, and there, among the Chinese clients getting their odd mixtures of herbs wrapped in white paper, I asked for 3 nutmeg seeds.

I got them wrapped in a plastic bag, and they were handed to me. I asked "Duo shao qian?--How much money?' The answer was "Bu yong, bu yong--It's not necessary." "Zhen de ma?--Really?" She was serious. Maybe it was the Laowai discount; maybe it was so little that they didn't know what to charge; or maybe it was a sample, and they're hoping I'll come back to buy 100 next week.

Christmas isn't Christmas without custard/eggnog or gingerbread, so I'm gearing up to make them in my crock pot. Nutmeg figures prominently in both, so in fact, one could argue that nutmeg itself makes the season. My colleagues grandma sent her some biscotti, flavored with nutmeg, which she shared with some of us, and I've been craving the warm, homey feeling of nutmeg ever since.

-吴佩芙

I'm from out of town...

The house is quiet again. DBF's parents and cousin stayed for one night, visiting from Guangzhou. It was a good visit. I met them after the Friday meeting at the Front Gate. We went to my place, to get settled, and then we had dinner at East Gate. The English Festival opening night performance was held on Friday night, so there was some built-in entertainment for the visit as well. We also watched and looked at or exchanged digital photo presentations of our travels.

They brought some very useful gifts, including Chinese chestnuts, peanuts in shells, mandarin oranges, pears, dried sweet potatoes, and a bag of hyacinth beans, which they thought were lentils. I looked online to find out how to cook them, and it looks like they might be poisonous. Well, poisonous if you don't cook them and change the water many times.

We ate at the student cafeteria in the morning. Then we walked around the campus, saw the reservoir. Then the cousin's friend from the city came to pick us up, and we went to the fort on the seaside, which according to the sign is made out of granite, glutinous rice, brown sugar, and lime. It was interesting, and there were some photo ops.

We had dimsum for lunch, and I tried fish balls. I didn't like them, but I managed to swallow 7 of them, since it took so much effort to get the fish ball soup without meat floating in it.

-吴佩芙

Hello, Touxie!

The apartment is cold these days. I find myself working with cold feet. I thought I would buy some socks and house sandals at QiBaJiu. I got some cute socks, and the slippers were so cute that I couldn't not get the Hello Kitty slippers.


-吴佩芙

Gua

The apartment smells like home. I made my Red, Yellow, and Green Dish tonight with some modifications. It's actually Green and Green today. It's supposed to be red pepper, yellow squash, and zucchini. I got green peppers at the vegetable stall on campus. Walmart had some zucchini-looking things. I suppose they are called Mexican squash in America. I got two big ones in case it was the right thing, and it was. It's totally unreproducible, though, because it was the only squash that didn't have an English tag at Walmart, and I could only recognize the character 瓜（gua: melon, gourd, or squash).

The topics of class are becoming drudgery. We started "immigration," but it can't be some interesting issue with provoking questions, it's about the immigration waves of the 1800's, like Ellis Island and the Statue of Liberty. It's designed for ESL, really. I don't feel comfortable with the topic because I feel like I'm always talking about America and how great America is and why people would want to go there. It's just too nationalistic for me. Oh, and by the way, there was also Angel Island, which is not exactly positive. I just don't want to discuss the topic at all. It's on the schedule for three weeks.

Last night I had a dream. I took Kavi to the vet. We had to wait a long time. In fact, I was getting a little mad because we were being passed over. And then I looked at him and he had collapsed in the box. I took him to drink from the water fountain, and he was ok. It was a little disturbing, though.

-吴佩芙

Love

"God's grace is undeserved, but it's not unconditional."

Someone left their printing on the printer in the office. I was there to print class materials, but since it was left there, I thought I would glance to see if I could deliver it to the appropriate person. The material was Christian in nature, which didn't surprise me too much. Having not gone to church since before I came to China, I thought I would read a little to see what the study was about. This sentence sent me spinning.

Christian or no, does this sentence even make sense? Undeserved means unearned, which means you can't do something to earn it. Unconditional means made without conditions or unreserved. There are too many negatives in the sentence: "God's grace is undeserved, but it is conditional." Ew, gross. Doesn't putting a condition on something mean that you earn it? The question went on to say that one must be humble to receive God's grace. Does this make sense: The condition is to be humble, and by being humble you are deserving.

It was drilled into all of our heads early that Grace means 'undeserved love.' I guess it's kind of assumed that undeserved also means unconditional, since whatever makes one deserving must be a condition. I just don't understand how a sentence like that makes someone feel better. Maybe if you meet the condition, it's not a big deal to you. It's the premise that bothers me: If you meet the condition, then you are better than those who haven't met it. Instead of feeling good for feeling good's sake, we have to tear down other people in the process. I just don't think this should fall under the umbrella of "Good News."

-吴佩芙

Thanksgiving

On Thanksgiving night, I gave a speech at the English Lounge. The students were interested in Thanksgiving traditions, so I had a PowerPoint prepared. My distinguished colleague got the students to help make apple crisp in a rice cooker. It was really fun.

Friday night, we were all invited to the swanky hotel in town for a Thanksgiving buffet. It was really exciting, although there weren't a lot of traditional foods. I'd been wanting soup so bad, but the pumpkin soup was more like a roux. It was a nice dinner, and so exciting to go to the swanky hotel. It's not the same without Aunt Mrl's slow cooker corn and cheese and green bean casserole.

Today was my plan to go to Walmart for something to make into soup, some oatmeal, and contact solution. I found Campbell's soup, corn with mushroom. I had it for lunch with some Chinese black-and-blue fry bread with sesame seeds, which I found out was stuffed with red beans. Oh well, it was just like the Bread Garden. The soup smelled and tasted like corn casserole. Mmmm, soup!

-吴佩芙

Resourcefulness Awards

I won my first Restourcefulness Award in college, for excellence in decorating, when I used Q-tips, wedged between layers of a mirror, to secure Christmas lights around the mirror. The lights were shaped like starfish, and the whole rig lasted for the academic year.

In China, resourcefulness comes in handy. Without a bag for my cell phone, I rigged a pocket with a bandana threaded and tied through a few belt loops. Without an oven, I made apple cobbler in my slow cooker, which actually turned out to be cake-like. Here is the shocking result:


I think today I will win another Resourcefulness Award, this one for excellence in toiletries. Yes, I made my own sugar wax, for removing body hair. Without strips, and without an old piece of cloth from which to cut strips, I tried cutting up a plastic Walmart bag. Not only did it work, but it was not as painful as regular wax with cloth or paper strips. Also, sugar "wax" is water soluble, so the clean-up was so easy.

-吴佩芙

ALLELUIA!!

Today I went with one of my colleagues to Topu (or however you spell it--the small town between here and downtown). There is a morning market there, where, we were told, they sell fresh tofu. As it turns out, they also sell fresh everything, including jumping shrimp and tilapia that are still flexing their gills. At the tofu stand, we looked up the word "firm" to ask for firm tofu, and the seller complemented our Chinese pronunciation. Much more exciting:

So exciting it deserves its own paragraph: The Topu market has a grain seller, with tons of different kinds of beans and grains. I found chana dal, which is basically like lentils, but a little smaller. LENTILS!!!!!! Chana dal is oblong and yellow, but definitely curry-able.

Another colleague lent me her slow cooker. I had some pintos soaking overnight, so I decided to try to cook them in a slow cooker, instead of cooking them for two hours on my gas stove. It worked wonderfully, and the whole place smelled delicious.

After a meeting with my Chinese tutor, I left for town.

Thoughts on being...

I've decided to post one of the emails I've written, since it sums up some of my thoughts so far, with more to come later:

We had 2 weeks of classes, and then we had National Holiday, which is a week-long break. I went to Xi'an with two of my distinguished colleagues, who are bf/gf. It went really well, and we all got along well. They are better in Chinese than me, and they taught here last year. We stayed together the whole time, in fancy hotels, in rooms (with bathrooms down the hall that were too scary to use), and on the floor of our Xi'an colleague's apartment.

We went to Shaolin Temple and the Terra Cotta Warriors. There were a lot of tourists because everyone had a break. We had some delicious food, esp. Indian food, which we don't have in Shantou.

I'm in the process of starting my Chinese classes and getting a tutor. After my trip, I feel a bit more motivated to learn Chinese a little better. The real issue that I feel is, if you can speak with people, even a little, they feel a bit more trustful of you, and they feel like you are a real person.

Many times students and little kids on campus, yell "hello" at us. They really don't have any other desire than to say "hello," and it feels like we are animals, exhibitions, or something. Even worse, in touristy areas, the street vendors yell, "Hello, hello, hello..." which means "hey, come look at my stuff, buy my stuff," while they trample over each other to get closer to us. It reminds me of 'Finding Nemo' where the seagulls say, "Mine, mine, mine..."

I'm also fascinated with some aspects of Buddhism, having visited a number of temples on our vacation. There is a goddess named GuanYin, who is like the Virgin Mary. She is the goddess of Compassion. We saw a 6 meter-high carving of her, which had 1,000 arms and 1,000 eyes (drawn on her hands). I read the story when I got home, and I think it's so interesting. Because of this, I would also like to read some Chinese novels and legends.

I'm finding some new interests, and China is starting to seem more comfortable now. Luckily, in our school, all of the students have at least a little English skill, so they can help us when we go to the cafeteria or when we buy things at the campus stores. Also, all of our teachers are qualified professional teachers, who have a lot of common interests, and some common personality traits. I would probably be miserable if these two factors didn't exist.

Also, the students treat us very well here. When they see us on the bus, we can tell that they are trying to build up their confidence to talk to us. When they see us with our supermarket bags returning home, they offer to help carry it to our apartment. Today a student walked to the bread shop with me after class, and she carried some of my bags to my apartment. They are most eager to spend more time practicing English.

-吴佩芙

Crazy Day

Today we walked up to the Taoist temple. My colleague hadn't been there yet, so we both had our exercise clothes and comfortable shoes, and we went up. It's always very fresh when you get to the top. The way there is not so fresh, though.

We had a meeting at noon. Just before the meeting I decided on my National Holiday plans, which will include some time in Xi'an. The meeting was so long, and the whole time I was considering how to get the tickets booked, and then how to find the office to pick up the tickets. Anyway, I had to run home, and when I got home, I realized that I was logged in at the office. I had to go to the office to log out. Then I went back home, and booked the tickets. Meanwhile, two of my distinguished colleagues were downtown waiting for me to call.

So I called them. We realized that I made a mistake in my booking, so they had to come with me to get the booking changed anyway (their Chinese is far superior). So since I was going downtown alone, I finally ran to the cell phone shop, and bought a cell phone. I asked two girls there to come with me and help in case I didn't understand the cell phone people. Then I was able to call them, and get real time directions when I wasn't sure where to get off on the bus. I couldn't get a taxi, so I took the bus, and they met me, and we took a petty cab to the office.

Anyway, the end result is I got my tickets to Zhengzhou and Xi'an. Then we took a cab back. And I had EL tonight, but it was good. The students were talking about lots of interesting topics.

-吴佩芙

The Banyan Tree

Banyan trees are a new fascination, since moving to China. There is a restaurant near campus called "The Banyan Tree" where patrons eat under tarps and the banyan tree's branches. It's the best food we can get around campus, and they know that vegetarian food means "no meat whatsoever."

Ever since I was little, I have loved trees with things hanging down, such as willow trees. Banyans have air roots that hang down, like brown fuzzy strings. When an air root reaches the ground, It begins to transform itself into a vine and eventually into a twisty trunk. This is why a banyan tree's trunk is actually a mass of thick twisted vines, reaching an outstretched hand out and grasping the ground.

There is an even older and bigger tree near the middle of the campus.

As you walk along the road that goes through the campus, suddenly the walk opens to the wide expanse of shade under the banyan tree. Bricks are tiled in a circle beneath it, which makes it stand out among all the other trees.

-吴佩芙

Stop Everything...

...and cue the angelic music. Today I found a pharmacy.

I went to Lotus with my neighbor. We are both new to China, so we thought we would try to go to Lotus on our own. That way if we get lost, at least we'll be lost together. In the end, there were students on the same bus going and returning, so we had people to talk to and a little reassurance that we were going the right way. I had a few goals today.
Baking soda: negative.
Flour: affirmative.
Curling iron: negative. (Well, expensive and all complicated ones are available.)
Lentils, written in pinyin and characters: negative. :(

Another goal was to get bandages and something to disinfect a cut. So I asked a few people by saying bian1 dai4, which means "bandage." I also showed them a hang-nail, and made a motion like wrapping something around my finger. Eventually, I got pointed to this little area in the front of the store. It was a real pharmacy with everything. I got bandages and some cotton swabs with disinfectant inside. I also got tiger balm. My cold is almost gone, so I didn't spend the time trying to negotiate cold medicines. But, wow! Nobody knew that it was at Lotus. People were telling me crazy places to go to a pharmacy, which were far from us and difficult to get to. This pharmacy definitely had anything you need. It also had English labels on the shelves and cases, such as 'gastro-intestine' and 'gynecologic' and 'fever/nausea' and 'vitamins.' My neighbor got some calcium supplements there too.

I don't even care that much about the lentils anymore. It's just so satisfying to know where the pharmacy is, for when I get sick, and I don't feel like navigating the city to find one.

Yay!
-吴佩芙

Rainbow California Happy Zone

I've seen a lot of interesting Tshirts around lately. "Rainbow California Happy Zone" is one of the more enjoyable ones, but I thought "Jesus Loves Even You" was also notable.

Also notable today: we went to Lotus, which is Chinese Walmart. I got a couple of towels and some Chinese children's books that have both Chinese characters and pinyin. They are really cute. Another great find was butter, which I need to make that box of Mac and Cheese I brought, and any that others send me . Butter comes in a baby package, not bigger than 1/2 c. Finally, I went to the vegetable stand, and got green pepper and carrots. I made a stirfry meal to break in my wok and rice cooker.

This evening we had the most enjoyable food. It's the most enjoyable for me because I didn't have to pick around or pretend that I don't see the meat in a "vegetarian" dish. It was Chinese barbecue, which is available in a stall right outside the campus gate. Everything is on a stick, and you choose the types you want to be cooked on the spot with special spicy-salty seasonings. I got eggplant, tofu, and greens. It was delicious. The woman in the stall keeps track of everything, and at least for us, she remembers our choices and charges us appropriately when we leave.

吴佩芙

I made it...

Yes, that's right. I'm in China. All the blogger buttons are in Chinese, so luckily I was familiar with their locations before moving. The apartment is very nice. There's even a person who comes to clean once a week. Isn't that shocking. When they told us that, we thought they were joking.

So far, I've eaten a wonderful lunch at a nice campus restaurant. We brought leftovers home, so I was also able to have dinner from that meal. I bought some plain yogurt yesterday, which I had for lunch, along with a Nutrigrain bar that I had brought.

I can see that I will be getting a lot of exercise, since there are no elevators in the buildings. My own apartment is on the fourth floor. I'm so happy to be walking everywhere again, even if it's sometimes hot and uncomfortable to do so.

Furthermore, I had almost no jet lag. The plane to Hong Kong was from 1:50 am in the US, to 7:00am in China, and it was 13 hrs. So I slept on the plane, and when we arrived, it was morning, just as if I had slept a normal night, except that I had to sleep sitting up. Also, the airline food was pretty good.

More later,
MsLin
吴佩芙

Oh, Self, I am so proud of you today...

You know, sometimes you are in the shower. You get the heebie-tibba-jeebies because you think you feel something on your foot. Or, you don't have your contacts in, and you mistake a hair clog for a huge scary bug. Usually, it's nothing. Well, I've had a silver fish slide right on into my bath water before, and I've freaked out substantially. Today, as I was finishing my shower, thank goodness, I felt something in the arch of my foot. And it was THIS:This is the actual photo of the actual gecko, so I'm not crazy. I felt sorry for the guy. He was just sitting in the tub after I got...um, jumped...out. He was looking around like, "(in gecko accent) Where am I? How did I get into this nutshell?" Isn't he cute? Ok, I've gotten pretty good at kicking bugs' a$$es, but I couldn't do that to this little gecko. I got him, on his own accord, to walk into a glass. Then I put a piece of paper on the open end, and I took him outside. I let him out on the pebbles in the landscaping, in the shade, and the sprinklers were going. A gecko never had it so good.

And I'm proud of myself for only freaking out initially, and then being able to carry a glass full of gecko out the door, down the steps, and down the sidewalk a little way, without getting all jumpy.

-MsLin

Punky Brewster, Family, & Flowers

If I sat down and thought about how many things there are that I know will work out, but I'm not sure quite how yet, I would go crazy. It's like an abyss, where I know they must have the things that I need, but I'm not sure how I will get them or when after I arrive.

I've really be focusing on saying goodbye to people and to things that I know won't be readily or cheaply available in China, like brownies. Maybe as an effect, I've been more interested in revisiting my childhood favorites. One favorite was Punky Brewster. I watched every minute of it, including the credits to make sure that I didn't miss any of the show. It was probably this show about which my parents first said, "Don't plan your life around TV." I was 7-8.

I've also been thinking a lot about my family and esp. my uncles. There are a couple little flickers of memories of my uncles. One time I was making chocolate chip cookies with my Grama K, and ML was coming home. She said, "We need to add extra chocolate chips, or else ML will ask where all the chocolate chips are!" I remember being 3, and my uncle MX taking a picture of me in my white dress on the lawn. I remember sitting between them while eating spaghettiI was a flower girl twice, but it feels like it was more than that. The first time, I wanted to wear purple, but my mom said that the bride gets to pick out the color. It was quite disappointing because the bride chose this ugly peach color, which was all the rage for weddings in the mid-80's. I don't remember which time, but one of my uncles took me into the entry way at The Farm to personally ask me to be the flower girl in his wedding. I don't remember how old I was, but I was totally impressed that he wanted to ask me personally. When I was that age, people didn't ask my opinion on too many things, and I was a "go with the flow" kind of kid. Obviously, I agreed because I was in the wedding. I don't remember how things went down. I just remember that feeling of respect that I felt, and I still appreciate my uncles for letting me feel like I was making my own important choice at such a young age.

-MsLin

Everything is Illuminated

Dwindling supplies of solutions and enzymes for Rigid Gas Permeable contacts has led me down many paths. I've called the companies, who say they discontinued these products because of low demand and low numbers of people with RGP lenses. I love my RGPs and I love that they don't soak up anything, so in a pinch, any solutions will do. (I got stranded in Atlanta, and ended up storing them in eye drops, which kept them dirty, but wet.)

That is why when AMO stopped making ProFree/GP, which is a bubbly, fizzy overnight enzyme tab, I was able to start using another enzyme Alcon's Opti-Free, which is intended for soft contacts, but serves the purpose. Well, what's a girl to do when Alcon stops making Opti-Free?

This is where being a pack-rat comes in handy. I still have the ProFree box, so I called the number today. AMO said they sold the product to another company and here's their number. So I called the company, and they are setting up production and should be ready with supplies in 6 mo. That's awesome! I didn't know there could be good news like that.

Honestly, I had been getting a little stressed about everything. My contact prescription is way expired, but my new ophthalmologist said he would rewrite my prescription, since it hasn't changed. I called and got the expired prescription, despite the optometrist office's suspicions.

I called about my car because the registration is almost up, but my car is in another state, and I'm trying to sell it. It's up for an emissions test, and I thought it would be a mess, but I can get a 30-day general use permit, which doesn't require emissions.

I'm getting things done. It's just that I've been pleasantly surprised at the easy answers to my hard questions.

-MsLin

Tou-xie

My shoes were considered "tou-xie" in Chinese, which is usually translated "slippers," but literally means "drag shoes." In other words, my shoes didn't have a heel strap. "Tou-xie" are usually considered "too casual" for work or school, even though my shoes were beautiful and far from flip-flops. I decided to get some sandals, which won't be questionable for work attire in China.

It's been three years since my last Dansko purchase, and I find their footwear to be the most comfortable and durable.

They came this week, "Lillian." Danskos are the kind of shoes that make you moan when you try them on because they are so comfortable. They are also very pretty, and come in classic and modern styles.

I bought a big suitcase yesterday, which makes the whole thing that much more real. I'm in the middle of packing to clean up the apartment too. It's so sad that I can't really think about it.

-MsLin

Language Acquisition

I found some old pictures, still in frames, inside my hassock, from every time DN and I visited each other. I found a wedding invitation, samples of perfume, notes written on scraps of paper. Notes that are no longer important, written on old checkbooks, "4:30 Monday, visit NH." Notes for html codes, "cornflower blue #6495ED." Notes on linguistic examples:

1a. Paint the red barn.
1b. Paint the barn red.
2a. See the red barn.
2b. *See the barn red.

I remember why I wrote this. It's about language acquisition. If children simply follow a pattern, how would they know that 2b is ill-formed? They don't follow a pattern, because there are tons of examples like this. Children are hard-wired to identify the adjective-noun order of English, and they will recognize 1b as having a special meaning, independent of 1a. The proper write-up involves elaborate phrase-structure tree drawings, and I'd love to impress you by drawing a likely-incorrect tree and BS-ing my way through, but I'm kind of preparing to go to China. I think you get it.

-MsLin

Degrassi

I was at work the other day, and I overheard one of my coworkers say, "blah, blah Degrassi blah, blah..." The word "Degrassi" means one thing to me, a show that was on public TV when I was younger. I watched it about 3 times, but one of those times was when my mom was home. Although, it was on public TV, Degrassi High was kind of racy. The episode I remember was about a girl who thought she was pregnant and went to an abortion clinic. My mom deemed it inappropriate.

The Degrassi concept has moved on, following through the Degrassi High character Spike, whose daughter is now in middle school-high school. In what's now called Degrassi The Next Generation, junior high students tackle issues such as meeting strangers on the internet, taking someone else's Ritalin, first dates, out-of-control rumors, and menarche.

I'm kind of excited about finding Degrassi again, but it's a Canadian show, which is pretty amateur-looking. The acting is not so realistic. But the thing that bugs me the most is how they say "SOrry" instead of "Sah-rry." And "What are you talking aBOAT?" It's the pure "o" that makes it difficult for me to take this show seriously.

-MsLin

Fires and Moving

My parents are cleaning out their basement. My mom's theory is that if she wouldn't run downstairs in a fire to rescue it, she's throwing it out. My theory for packing for China is a little different. If I would rescue it in a fire, I'm not taking it to China. That includes a lot of my favorite books and my Turkish coffee grinder.

My theory on books is, if the book is good enough, you should have a "home copy" and a "traveling copy," because I'm a little obsessive like that. For example, my "home copy" of Mists of Avalon is the hard cover reissue that came out a few years ago. My "traveling copy" is my first copy, which is a paperback, but pretty flimsy, since it's a book of over 1,000 pages. I have four copies of The Peacock Spring by Rumer Godden, most of which I found at thrift stores. With The Peacock Spring I waited so long to find my own copy, and then whenever I saw it, I had to buy it. Don't worry, I've probably only put down $4 on this title. The thing is it's not popular and it's out-of-print, so if something happens to my copy, then I have a back-up, and if something happens to that copy, I have another back-up, and so-on and so-on. I need to really be picky about the books I carry to China, just because books are kind of a pain to move, esp. over an ocean.

I won't have an oven. That means I won't need a lot of the cooking stuff I have, all of my gadgets, a pastry mixer, a mixer-mixer. It's going to be like being in college again, except one step higher because I'll have a microwave AND and stove. I probably won't need measuring cups, because I can't think of a time when I used measuring cups to cook on the stove; I use a liquid measurer for that. It will be fine--just like in the summer, when it's too hot to bake.

-MsLin

Why the hell is "hell" a swear word?

When we use words as swear words, they lose their true meaning and become exactly that: swear words. It's almost as if the definition of a swear word is a word that is offensive, but used in a context in which it has no real meaning. Furthermore, when a swear word is used in a meaningful context, it usually has a more desirable alternative. (e.g. "to make love" or "a female dog")

But "hell." I don't think it's a swear word here: "It's like my own personal hell." It Iisa swear word in "What the hell?" and "Get the hell out of here" and "Go to hell/See you in hell." It lacks a more desirable alternative, exp. for "Hades," which isn't really more desirable, but is more Greek.

It's very difficult to find a true meaning for swearing or vulgarity. When you look it up, you find "indecent" or "profane," but like the words they describe, the meaning of vulgarity depends on the meaning and connotation a particular person attaches to it.

I think "hell" is a swear word because of superstition. Certainly, in the case of "Go to hell," hell is used in a meaningful context, but in that case it's truly an evil wish. But I suppose making "hell" a swear word is more-likely caused by a superstitious desire to avoid saying the names of evil things. After all, doesn't The Secret teach that if you want to avoid something bad, focus on the good. In other words, say "Heaven" because that is where you want to go, and avoid saying "Hell," even in a negative context because you don't want to go there.

Keeping "H-E-Double Hockey Stick" on the "bad words" list is effing ridiculous if you ask me.

-MsLin
P.S. The Secret is complete pap and I do NOT endorse or encourage the reading, buying, borrowing, or redistributing of this rag. The Secret is: If you want something, as the Universe. But you must ask in a positive way. If you say "I don't want cancer," you will attract cancer to yourself. So, instead you should say, "I want to be healthy," in order to attract good health. Sounds a little like victim blaming, doesn't it? Ok? So now you don't have to read it. The rest is testimonials from normal and famous people. It's almost as much crap as J.Z. Knight being interviewed while channeling Ramtha, which I just can't get enough of. Look up Ramtha on your own if you don't believe me, and see J.Z. Knight channeling an Atlantian warrior from 35,000 yrs. ago, who speaks English with a British accent and bad grammar.

Musicals

I checked out Phantom of the Opera from the library. I guess I HAVE seen it live before, at the Ordway in Minneapolis. We went two times, Thalians, which was our school's speech group. The first time we saw Les Mis which obviously made a bigger impression than Phantom. We were in the nosebleed, which means folding chairs in the second balcony (yes, folding chairs). Those were the best two school trips ever, all of us on a school bus to Minneapolis, and we traipsed around downtown until the performances. And, afterwards we would stop at the Mall of America.

I've always been fascinated by Phantom, but not the musical. I have my favorite Phantom of the Opera TV miniseries on an old video tape somewhere in my parents' house. It was a great miniseries, which didn't have all of the songs, and featured a very handsome Raul, and actually showed a glimpse of the Phantom's face and how he got that way. (His mother, who resembled Christine, had an affair with the opera director. He refused to marry her when she became pregnant, and she tried to commit suicide by slowly walking deeper and deeper into a lake. Which I thought was kind of a romantic way to commit suicide, albeit frightening and painful. He saved her, but she got more and more pregnant and more and more miserable. The next time he saw her, she was at the end of her pregnancy, buying some potion presumably to induce abortion. After drinking the potion, she went into labor, and he delivered the baby under the opera house. So, the potion burned the baby's face. Alternatively, he had a birthmark on his face, and it didn't have anything to do with the potion. ?? But I digress.)

Here's the list: Les Mis twice, at the Ordway and at Hancher. Victor/Victoria with THE Julie Andrews on Broadway with my aunt and uncle. Cabaret on Broadway with my uncle, and then at Hancher. And Hair at the Des Moines Civic Center on a trek with my college friend AH. And may I say that Hair was the first time I saw a naked man, which was shocking and disturbing and...I was so disappointed. I can't even tell you how much I love Hair.

-MsLin

I'm a vegetarian, and no, my shoes aren't leather.

*I've decided that some posts are better off in my personal journal. I do want to mention that I've just seen Earthlings as narrated by Joaquin Phoenix. I'm disgusted at every turn by our/my utter complacency toward animals and other humans. Watch it, but don't watch it. (Google video)

I've been a vegetarian for almost 1/2 of my life (13 yrs. in October). I wish I had more guts. When I first became a vegetarian, my classmates bothered me about it: asking me if I had leather shoes, if I eat eggs, if I eat cheese, and did I know that leather, eggs, and cheese come from animals too? After all, they didn't want me to unknowingly be a hypocrite. Oh, and the most annoying, most ignorant question that vegetarians have to put up with: Where do you get your protein? It sounds innocent, but at least to me and, I would guess, to other vegetarians, we hear things that aren't said: Don't you know vegetarianism is so unhealthy? -and-You must be pretty stupid, cutting out your only protein source. -and-I'm going to catch you in your uninformed ignorance. -and-I'm determined to prove to you that being a vegetarian is a bad choice.

Finally, the absolutely most annoying is the assumption that just because I'm a vegetarian, I love all vegetables, and cast aside all preference. The idea is that when you cut out meat, a "major" part of your diet (primarily derived from 4 sources: cows, pigs, chicken, fish), you limit yourself way too much by also refusing those vegetables that you dislike. My parents explained this to me when I refused to eat mushrooms, which aren't really a vegetable, and asparagus, as I had refused for my entire life. Vegetables, incidentally, are derived from many many sources, so many that I can't name all of those that are sold in my local market. Therefore, my refusing to eat one or two types of "vegetables" shouldn't be too much of an issue. (I do eat asparagus now, with Italian dressing.) The argument didn't hold, and everything turned out ok.

Honestly, I forget that I'm a vegetarian. I read labels and order food without meat instinctively, and I forget that it's weird. One time we were going to make a chili bean dip with some friends, who I had known for two years. We all went to the grocery store, and one friend picked up beef chili with no beans. That's when I realized that I had never told her. No harm done, no one offended. It's just something that doesn't come up unless it matters.

I've been known to choke down meat and mushrooms, for that matter, out of fear of offending a, usually foreign, host. The last time I had beef was in Turkey, mushrooms in SF, and pork eleven years ago in Czech Rep. The last time I had chicken was out with DBF's colleagues at a Phoenix restaurant, where we waited forever for our food, the waiter was incompetent, and my dinner got switched with someone else's at our table, even after the waiter took them back to check which was which. Meat as a surprise is the least amusing kind.
And that brings me to shoes. Actually, I have some leather shoes, which is something that I try to avoid if I can, but also something that is pretty hard to avoid. We have a dinner to go to tonight, so I went to look at shoes to wear with black pants and one of those stylish polyester shirts. I'm picky about shoes with heels because I really don't think one should be in danger of falling or twisting an ankle due to tipsy heels. I found these, which had a blue sticker, which meant that they were 50% off, yay. Then one of the workers came over to me and said that they were changing all of the blue stickers to yellow stickers, which meant they would be 80% off, YAY! So, these are so cute, entirely man-made, non-leather shoes, which I got for the low low price of $10. I can't even stand it!

-MsLin

Bald Eagles

When I was little, I was pretty much the same, I absorbed useless information and remembered rules to the note. So, one day my teacher asked the class "Why is the bald eagle called 'bald?'" I knew the answer, since I had seen it on a kids nature show. I retold what I had heard, that the word "bald" has a connection to the word "white" in Old English, and this refers to the white head.

She looked at me like I was an idiot and said, "No, it's because they look bald, with no color on their head." I felt stupid, but that's how I usually felt in school. I had a tactless teacher who didn't mind humiliating me, even when I was right.

I saw a special on bald eagles this morning on Today. They've been removed from the endangered and threatened lists. I remembered the discussion so long ago, as I always remember when someone mentions or I see a bald eagle. I decided to look up the reason for the name "bald eagle" on Wikipedia. If I was stupid and gullible as a child, then I decided that I would let it go and get over it. Here is what Wikipedia said: "Bald in the English name is derived from the word piebald, and refers to the white head and tail feathers and their contrast with the darker body." In your face, first grade!

I never wanted to go to school in first grade. My teacher was horrible, always making me feel stupid, giving me bad grades for following directions too literally, never giving positive rewards, enabling other kids to make fun of me, and dropping me from the top reading group, only to promote my babysitter's son. My generic blue crayon colored purple, and I knew I wasn't crazy. I got in trouble for coloring things that were supposed to be blue purple. So when I colored an ice cube white, I got in trouble because she couldn't tell that I colored it. Well, actually ice cubes are clear, but I thought white would be ok. I guess I should've colored it blue...um, purple.

-MsLin

The Peanut Butter Solution

...was a movie about a boy who was cursed and all of his hair fell out. A witch gave him a recipe for a concoction that would make his hair grow again. It worked a little too well, and his hair grew fast and never stopped. So they started making paint brushes out of his hair, which were magic.

I still had the scotcharoo craving, and I still had the resistance to shopping for ingredients. So I used what I had and loosely followed a recipe in my macrobiotics cookbook. The result was marshmallow-free, and not too crazy sweet. They are:
1/3 c. pure maple syrup
1/6 c. natural peanut butter
Heated on the stove, over med. heat, until smooth and bubbly.
2 c. Go Lean cereal
Mixed into the syrup mixture and pressed into a small bowl.
1/4 c. choc. chips
2 Tbsp. peanut butter
Melted in the microwave and spread on top.

I guess this will cover the craving because I don't have any other way to get scotcharoos. I'm just proud that the recipe worked, and it tasted pretty good. I finally used up my choc. chips too.

-MsLin

Scotcharoos

I'll give anything for a scotcharoo! Rice Krispies, marshmallow, peanut butter, with chocolate on top. I used to make them with my grama. I just want one because I know they are not exactly diet friendly. I don't want to make a whole pan, and I don't want to buy all of the ingredients because I'm trying to clean out the kitchen right now. But sometimes you have a craving, and nothing but that thing will satisfy you.

I don't really want a lot of kids, but lately I've been thinking that if you have a lot of kids, you can make a whole batch of cookies, and you have enough people to eat it, so they aren't sitting around the house tempting you. I know, that's not a good reason to have kids. Conversely, I'd have to make pounds and pounds of steak, fish, pork, and other things I hate. Live by cooking for an army, die by cooking for an army, right?

My grama had six kids, and she was a pro at cookies and bars. Besides that she made casserole a lot, as I remember. Casserole is great and easy. I don't think DBF would eat casserole.

After I get over this scotcharoo thing, DBF is going to start an abdominal exercise regime with me. Yay!

-MsLin

Rudeness is Magic

There are a few people that it's just not advisable to be rude to. One is anyone who will now, or in the future, handle your food. Another is people who work for you and your coworkers or classmates. Consider the situation that you have coworkers who handle your food, then you should really not be rude to them. The thing is that there is a feeling among coworkers: "We're all in this together." Even if you would never hang out outside of work, you still discuss work stuff while at work. Through this theory, I've never had a problem with a coworker, and I've never had any desire to be rude to a coworker, esp. given the idea that I will likely be seeing them often.

Our superiors have decided that employees are not allowed to have drinking water while on duty in the store. I don't know the exact rule, but it was mentioned to me, and I use a Nalgene bottle. Another coworker came over to get water in a cup with a lid because the version of the rule she heard was that bottled water wasn't allowed, but a cup with a lid and your name on it was ok. I don't get the difference, but whatever. The whole thing about water is so stupid. If the version I heard was true, and we aren't allowed to have water at all, then I'm glad I'm quitting in a month. In the dry air, it's easy to get dehydrated, to start feeling sick, and to lose your calm demeanor.

As an added complication today, we had a mix up with the soda machine tubes, so our water, from the soda machine tasted peppery like Pepsi. The water from the tap behind the counter goes through the same filtering system, so we use it like the soda machine water.

Anyway, one of our coworkers came over for a cup of water with a lid. As we went to get water from the tap, she started yelling. We said, it's the same filtered water, and our soda machine water tastes peppery because of the mix-up. I'm not kidding these are her exact words, "Well, YOU CAN KEEP IT THEN BECAUSE I'VE HAD YOUR TAP WATER, and IT'S NOT THE SAME." While she's walking away. I would've said, "Ok, that's fine, but I don't want water from the tap. Thanks anyway." I wouldn't have gotten all hostile.

I'll tell you what, though. All the nasty rudeness actually worked. The soda machine water magically got fixed. The crazy rule was overturned. It made me feel all warm inside. It made me NOT fantasize about giving out "sneeze muffins." That's what I mean "Rudeness is magic." Being nice never got anything done.

Kicking kittens is also an effective method.

-MsLin

Guide to Owning a Bird

To your dog, you are a god. To your cat, you are a servant. To your fish, you are a ghost or a wizard. To your bird, you are an equal. You probably haven't noticed, but you have a shiny thing [earring] stuck in your earlobe; he'll remove it for you. You probably can't reach the top of your head, and the feathers [hair] up there needs preening; it's his specialty. You're amazed that he can talk; he's amazed that you can whistle.

He studies your mannerisms, as you study his. When his comb straight up, you know he's scared, when it's flat, he's threatened, when it's half way up, he's found something interesting and he's content. He tries to get your attention by knocking on things with his beak. He knocks his beak on the table, squats down, and holds his wings loosely to show that he is happy and he likes you, sometimes making the vague motions of knocking, though not actually making contact with his beak.

He's not afraid to climb, and he's not afraid to fall. He wants to be in the highest possible location. He is not satisfied by perching on your shoulder when your head offers the best view. He's not satisfied perching on your head when he could perch on a shower rack, open door, curtain rod, or fan blade.

Flocks stick together, and you should never have to do anything alone. When you eat, he eats. He studies what you eat, and occasionally, boldly ventures an outstretched beak into your bowl or onto your plate to test it out. When you sleep, he sleeps. If you cover his cage, but he knows you're awake, he makes talking noises, whistles to you, and peeks out from under the cover.

Yesterday Kavi went to a bird boarding house, where he can play with other birds until I come back from China.

-MsLin

On Fairy Tales

I visited some friends yesterday, and the conversation turned to fairy tales, since my friend has a 2 1/2-yr-old daughter. She tells her daughter "clean" fairy tales. For example, in "Little Red Riding Hood," the grandmother doesn't get eaten, instead she locks the door so the wolf can't come in. It's true that the fairy tales of old are incredibly violent, include strange torture, and are sorely lacking in strong, independent women.

On the other hand, these stories are part of our common experience. Consider meeting someone who has never seen the Wizard of Oz or someone like Phoebe on Friends who doesn't know the Old Yeller dies at the end. It's important to know the true story, so that you can talk about it and share it with others. In fact, these common stories are useful for me in teaching, since many of them are told in my students' native languages. Since the students already know the storyline and the characters and objects that will appear, it's a good way for them to learn English vocabulary in a fun way. (I did this in pronunciation with advanced learners with "The Tortoise and the Hare," which all of them had heard, but it was a great discussion about pronunciation and difference between a "hare" and a "rabbit."

My Grama told me all the real stories (and I turned out fine, btw). She had the best books, and lots of them. My favorites were Sleeping Beauty and Hansel and Gretel. Hansel and Gretel had really nice illustrations, especially of the witch, and I think I also liked that it was a bit disturbingly intriguing. For example, the idea that the witch was going to eat Hansel and that they killed the witch by tricking her and pushing in the oven carried some intrigue, since it's a strange Sylvia Plath way to die. But the witch was really the best character. Hansel and Gretel were blonde with pointy noses, and I know they were supposed to be protagonists, but I always liked the witches. This one was drawn particularly well, with green skin, the color of a green olive, and she had a huge mop of long, straight, stringy white hair, and her size was quite daunting compared to the children.



I've always held a soft-spot for villains, and witches in particular. From Disney, my favorite is Maleficent (which means "evil-doer") from Sleeping Beauty. But really Maleficent, or her traditional counterpart really isn't so bad, and she is pretty weak actually. The fairy's magic always prevails. Another favorite is the Queen in Snow White. She is so purely evil, self-absorbed, and clinically crazy that she must've existed. When I heard the command to the Huntsman to put Snow White's heart in a box, it gave my stomach a turn, but it's still more mundane than recent horror flicks. Anyway, the Huntsman lets Snow White get away, so the slight horror of wondering if he would really go through with it, goes away quickly. The queen, however, is still a looming threat, and I suppose we were supposed to get the message: "Don't take food from strangers, but living with seven little men is okay."

-MsLin

Tell me something I don't know...

I got a new fortune, which I must admit is better than "If it ain't broken, don't fix it." As far as fortunes go, it's actually pretty nice. Usually, I get weird ones that say, "When you walk into a room, the room just lights up." (I've never actually gotten this as a fortune, but they've been similar, and this phrase has come to be my pet peeve eulogy, by the way.) Anyway, that's a statement about personality, not a real fortune. Fortunes come in three types: 1) cliches or proverbs, 2) statements about personality (always good, by the way) and 3) actual fortunes. Plus, the ones that have winning lottery numbers. This most recent fortune is a good, true fortune, except that I already knew about this "great water-crossing" trip.

Being a logical person, I get my advice on the future solely from fortune cookies. Our family has a tradition that you can't hand a fortune cookie to another person, since touching a fortune cookie means that the fortune inside is meant for you. I will admit that it's only something we play at, but I like a good fortune all the same.

So I commend the company for writing a real fortune, but would anyone pay a psychic if she only produced commonly known knowledge (e.g. "Tomorrow will be Thursday")? I don't think so.

-MsLin

Milk and Other Sources of Yellow

So milk doesn't, in fact, make you skinny. The "Got Milk?" people are pulling the "Milk your diet. Lose Weight!" ads after a bit of pressure from vegan groups, a petition from the Physicians Committee for Responsible Medicine, and the Federal Trade Commission. (see news story here: http://abcnews.go.com/Health/wireStory?id=3162749) Don't those ads say something like "...with a sensible diet and regular exercise." Guess what? With a sensible diet and regular exercise, 1 oz. of chocolate every day will make you lose weight. Because the chocolate is like a placebo, as long as you believe it works, it works. But what really makes me mad, is that they had me choking milk down again thinking that it would help my weight loss regime.

I've hated milk for a long time. The first time I remember hating milk was in day care, when I was four. It was a rule that we had to drink a cup of milk with our lunch every day. I didn't like it, so my mom sent a cup of orange juice along one day, which I assumed could replace my milk at lunch. However, when lunch came, the "day care provider" said that I could only drink my juice after I drank my milk. So I gulped the milk really fast just to get rid of it. When she gave me the juice, I threw up.

Through all this time, I remember that it didn't occur to me that I didn't like milk. Afterall, everyone said, "Milk is good for you. It's healthy. Make sure you drink it." So, I guess even to myself, I was denying that it was even possible to dislike milk. I can handle chocolate milk, but I really prefer to stay away from it all together.

This brings me to the second time I remember not liking milk. My kindergarten teacher Mrs. B and I made a deal. You remember in school, or maybe you don't, that you had milk at lunch, and then one other time during the day in the afternoon. Before you could leave the lunch room, the monitor would pick up your milk carton to make sure it was empty. At our school we could have chocolate milk on Fridays, which was easier for me. I think I must've had some sort of break down (as much of a break down as a 5-yr-old can have) because I just remember crying and telling Mrs. B how much I hated milk, and I wished we didn't have to drink it all the time...or if we did have to drink it all the time then I wished we could have chocolate milk. Anyway, she said that as long as I could drink regular milk until Friday, then I could definitely have chocolate milk on Friday, every week. And that is kind of a reward for getting through the week with regular milk. I think this is reason for my diet strategy, which is "Friday is Free day," which means if you eat healthy all week, on Friday you can have something you are really craving, like an ice cream cone, or macaroni and cheese, etc.

I have determined that the issue I have with milk is mostly due to its strong yellow flavor. Yellow tastes or smells like something that came from a body: sweat, mucus, blood, snot, sometimes eggs. And, milk also comes from a body. There are also plant-based yellow flavor sources, the strongest of which are cilantro, dill, and ginkgo trees. However, yellow isn't always bad, it's just bad in milk and sickness, because I like cilantro. Bleach is also yellow.

I have identified my personal colors for occasionally unpleasant flavors and smells, and their corresponding, regular person examples. "Strong" means mostly unpleasant, (yellow is strong) and "mild" means mostly neutral:
brown (strong): mushrooms, wet dogs, leather, wood, new car smell, cigarette smoke, cooking beef, goat cheese
white (strong): chemicals, ammonia, illegal drugs
green (medium): grass, evergreen
blue (mild): rosemary, mint, basil, sage, fuzzy plants and peach skin
red/orange (strong): moulding produce, tomatoes, vomit, vinegar


-MsLin

Full-Circle

There are times in life when you feel like things are coming full-circle, like when I went to camp and met "Josh," just before going to the University. He said that his brother was going to go to the same university for grad. school. I thought: Ok, I might meet "Sam" sometime, and I saw a guy who looked vaguely like Josh at church, but didn't really check anything out. Then, 6 yrs. later, I was at an end of the year party with my grad. school comrades. My colleague's wife, saw me standing chatting with my grad. school friend, and she said, "Let me introduce you to someone: That is Sam, his dad is a pastor..." I said his last name, and she made the introduction. So, it took six years, but it came to pass that I did, in fact, meet Josh's brother, even though it was at the very end of my University years.

There are a couple of "famous last words" that I remember from when I was a kid. The first one went something like this: I was in the car with my mom, and I said, "Mom, you know there are some people who don't eat meat?" She said, "Yeah, I know." I'm like, "I don't think I could ever do that." She goes, "Me neither." Probably 5 yrs. later, I went vegetarian.
Lately, I've been thinking that I never expected that I would 1) have a boyfriend, 2) be living in the Southwest and 3) be going to teach for a year in China. I don't really know what I expected, but not any of that stuff. In fact, many of the things I said I would do, haven't happened, and many of the things I said I would never do, have happened.

This brings me to a third point, which is that I have never liked my name. I sounds like someone throwing up. And I get a little offended when Dbf calls me by my name, since it sounds so serious when he does it. I remember another time with my mom: I said, "Mom, what's my name?" She's like, "It's Beth." I say, "Really? But I don't like it." "Well, maybe someday you will like it." "I don't think so...When I go to college, can I have people call me Joanne?" "When you go to college, you can go by whatever name you want." But there's a stigma attached to people who don't like their names. One of my grad. school colleagues had that problem. She wanted to go by her middle name, but she had to jump through hoops to get the University to give her an email address with her first initial instead of her first name, and getting her name to show up correctly on directories, etc., was just a hastle. (And I remember thinking, why is she making such a big deal about it, it kind of seems like nit picking, esp. when I met her family, and they all called her by her first name.) I'm now getting another situation in which I could change my name, but again it seems like too much of a hastle. When I go to China, I can use my Chinese name, which has a nice meaning, but for some reason it reminds me of diapers "Bei Fu." I actually, don't think I would be happy with any name. So I accept my name as a label, and it's not so bad because I'm probably the only one who thinks it sounds like someone puking.

-MsLin

The Best Movie Moment Ever!

I believe that it's impossible to determine the best movie moment ever. In order to figure out the best anything ever, one must first watch all of the possibilities. In movie terms, that's impossible, so the "best ever" is more likely the "most popular" moment of that type. So if I assert that one scene is the most romantic scene ever in a movie, the opposition must see my scene for a fair comparison.

I bring it up because once again I've been thinking about Merlin and the Sword. For me the most romantic scene in a movie ever does not involve Audry Hepburn or the like. It is in Merlin and the Sword, which is a rarely seen movie; in fact, so rare that it's not available on DVD.
Lancelot is played by Rupert Everett, and when he meets the queen, they talk in the garden. The queen tries to pick a rose, but she is cut by a thorn. Lancelot picks it for her, and she says"...but why didn't it [stick] you?" And he says, "It did." And she presses their hands together...

-MsLin

Coffee Shop of the Year!

I went to the grocery store today to buy a bottle of shower cleaner and a frozen lasagna entree. It just so happens that the store has a Tully's Coffee inside it. Usually, I peruse the bakery items, as I walk by. However, today as I walked by, I saw all of these huge Guayaki signs! They have Guayaki lattes, mochas, and shakes.

I've been drinking Guayaki for a year. It's a kind of tea from Central America. Well, it's not really tea, it's a tincture or an herb, because it's not from the tea plant. The tincture is actually called Yerba Mate and Guayaki is the largest company that sells it right now, and it's supposed to be healthy like green tea. Anyway, the point is, Mate is kind of on the fringe, and because of it's taste, it may not appeal to the casual tea or coffee drinkers. However, I liked the small hot mate mocha I tried, and I'm so excited that Tully's has Guayaki. Maybe some day Yerba Mate will go mainstream. I can't believe it!

I'm making a list of things that I will miss when I go to China. Guayaki Original Mate and Chai Mate is on the list. I love it!

MsLin

The Electric Kool-Aid Acid Test

I looked for this book on-and-off for three years. I don't know where I heard about it, but I believe it was in the summer, during my middle school years, that I first went to the public library to request this book by interlibrary loan, by which I had gotten many rare books in the past. The library had a kind of networked computer, so they could search the whole database of libraries all over Iowa. For those three years, the librarian told me that the book was not in the database, meaning, likely it didn't exist. (At this point, I consider the possibility that 1. she didn't know how to spell Kool-Aid, or 2. she found the book, but deemed it inappropriate for me, and refused to order it.) Either way, since it wasn't in the database, that meant that in the whole state of Iowa, not one public library, not even the Des Moines Public Library, had it. Therefore, in the mind of the libarians, I was crazy, and this book that I kept asking for was a total myth and a hoax.

Perhaps that's why the whole idea of the library in 'The Abortion,' by Richard Brautigan is so delicious to me. Imagine a library, where anyone can contribute their book. No matter what, the library accepts the contribution, and even allows the author to place the book on any shelf they wish. The role of the librarian is to accept the books and to write them into a log book. Hopefully, 'The Electric Kool-Aid Acid Test' was there, and if it wasn't, there was something similar that would keep my interest.

Well, now I know the book exists: it's on Amazon. It's a non-fiction book about Ken Kesey and his psychadelic bus. I've heard about Ken Kesey and seen a few interviews in documentaries. I suppose if I had gotten ahold of this book in middle school, I wouldn't have really understood it, but it's nice to know that adults lie.

-MsLin

Fortune

Yesterday we went to our favorite Chinese buffet. It was nice. I wore a skirt and one of my favorite summer shirts. It is kind of far, but DBF and I think it's worth it, since the closer buffets are exponentially worse. At any rate, we went, despite the traffic, and the Friday night business, which actually wasn't too bad.

As far as the buffet, it was good. DBF eats so many creatures. I'm reminded of 'The Walrus and The Carpenter,' since he ended up with all of these tiny shells, empty all over his plate. Even though, they serve desserts on the buffet, they also bring fortune cookies, which we just open and read, being not too interested in eating more at this point. So here (above) is my so-called fortune. I thought it was pretty funny at the time.

I'd like to see "Fake it 'til you make it" on a fortune sometime.

-MsLin

Life is a Cabaret

"I don't think people should have to explain
anything. For example, if I should paint my fingernails green
and it just so happens I do paint them green, well, if anyone
should ask me why, I say: " I think it's pretty!" ("I think
it's pretty," I reply.) So, if anyone should ask about you
and me, you have two alternatives: you can either say,
"Oh, yes, it's true. We're living in delicious sin." Or
you can simple tell the truth, and say:

I met this perfectly marvellous girl
In this perfectly wonderful place
As I lifted a glass
To the start of a marvellous year.
Before I knew she called on the phone,
Inviting.
Next moment I was no longer alone,
But sat reciting
Some perfectly beautiful verse,
In my charming Amearican style.
How I dazzled her senses
Was truly no less than a crime.

Now I've this perfectly marvelous girl
In my perfectly beautiful room
And we're living together
And having a marvellous time."

Cliff is in Berlin at the beginning of the war, because he wants to get experience for his book, which is a good plot for the musical, but how stupid is Cliff? Don't get me wrong I love, LOVE, LU-BLOVE Cabaret, but part of the lure of good theater is that it's not realistic, like the "Gilmore Girls" and their awful eating habbits, yet small- to normal-sized bodies. However, in the case of "Gilmore Girls," I think I would be happier if they weren't hyper-focused on eating junk (presumeably they do this in the show to counteract the weight- and diet-obsessed culture).

Cabaret my first Broadway show...at Studio 54. Actually, I saw Julie Andrews in Victor/Victoria, which was ok. I guess I'm not into Julie Andrews pretending to be a male drag queen, too confusing. My uncle bought me a fuzzy navel at Cabaret, and they didn't check my ID because I was in the bathroom. We were sitting close on the floor, and everyone had little cabaret tables next to their seats. It was really theater. It was one of the profound experiences in my life. I could be Sally Bowles, and I quote her, mostly in my head, esp. this "Perfectly Marvelous" song. That, and "When I saw her laid out like a queen, she was the happiest...corpse I'd ever seen."

Come to think of it, my uncle got a drink at Victor/Victoria too, it was kind of little and coffee-tasting. My uncle is a "do-what-you-want" kind of guy. One time when I stayed with them, he brought home a pile of $100 bills, and made me roll in them on the floor: "Come on, when ah ya evah gonna get a chance ta do this again," he said in Jersey-ese. He's a fun uncle, but sometimes lacking in conscience and modesty. Maybe it's better not to worry about being proper all the time, and instead we should follow our hearts and be free more often. Thanks, Uncle JM! (Urgh! Almost all of my uncles, wait...ALL of my uncles have either J or M names, even the ones who were married in, I'm not kidding.)

I guess people start blogs to "keep in touch," albeit one-sidedly, with friends and family. I don't consider my life terribly exciting, but hopefully it will be soon.

-MsLin